The Schedule

No matter how many mistakes I make in my life, or how slow my progress is, I am still way ahead of everyone who isn’t even trying.

When I asked my mother how she handled her free time after working all those years, she said she put herself on a schedule every day.  Well, that made sense to me.  I had spent all my working years living by the schedule in my plan book.  My plan book and the school schedule told me when to start my day, eat my lunch, go home, and even when I could use the restroom.  A written plan sounded reasonable to me.  She told me she did certain things on the same day during the week.  I was willing to give that a try.  Off to Target I went in search of a whiteboard so I could make the perfect schedule so I would know what I was going to do every day.   In my mind I thought I had to plan something for every day and then I would feel like I was using my time wisely.  Listen to me, in retirement it is not necessary to do something every day.  I had to learn the hard way that at some point I was going to need to rest because let’s face it, I was older and did not have as much energy as I did when I was younger.   My plan was on Monday I would volunteer at the senior center packing meals for home delivery and then serving lunch to those who walked in to eat at the center.   On Tuesday I went to the gym to work out with my trainer.  Every Wednesday I volunteered for 3 hours in two different classrooms at school.  Even though I was not very good with plants, I worked in the yard and flowerbeds on Thursday.  Friday was the only day I did not schedule any activity where I had to leave the house.  This was my day to clean house. I was also tutoring five students during the week in the late afternoons.  Now that I am writing this, I can see how crazy it all sounds.  Yep, I was using my time wisely, I thought.  Now that I have done this for the two years I have been retired, I am exhausted. Time to regroup.  I am rethinking this schedule thing.  I wonder what would actually happen if I played it by ear for a while?  Scary thought for me, who needed to have each day filled.  I wonder if I will learn more about myself if I just take time to sit still?