Don’t Cry Now That it is Over, Smile Because it
Happened
My
Ohio family has gone back home after being with us for a week. The visit went as planned and overall I think
everyone was satisfied. Since I had not
seen them for two years, I was overjoyed when my sister and I finally worked
out all the bugs and they had reservations and an arrival time and date. We started talking about this in January or
February. It looked like it was not
going to happen. I told my sister that I
was just going to start visualizing them all sitting on my back patio with
me. A positive attitude does help.
A few
years ago I was in a Hallmark store and I saw a card that said, “It has finally
happened. I have become my mother.” Humm…. I had to think about that for a while. My mother has some characteristics that serve
her well and others that I hoped would never be part of my personality. However, I can now see a lot of my mother in
me. She worries about everything. I do have that characteristic and I am
certain my life would be a lot more fun if I did not. Is worry a trait you can inherit? If it is, I got it from her and my
grandfather. What would a day without
worry be like for me? I would give
anything to have a day like that. I beat
myself up at times because I equate worry with a lack of trust in God. Oh if I could just get up and say, “Ok
God. This day is yours and I am just
along for the ride.” There have been
times in my life when if I was in control, I felt safe. Maybe this was a false sense of security, but
it worked for me in the past.
It
has been two days since the family left and I must admit I have had my crying
spells. I just have to remind myself of
the saying I started with and that is to not cry that it is over, but be glad
that they got to come in the first place.
We are already planning to go to Ohio to see them the next time. It's true there is not as much to do in Ohio
as there is in California. But somehow
the fresh corn, fried green tomatoes, home made cookies, and long talks with
the people I love make me forget that.
Now
it is time to get back to working on myself.
It starts tomorrow with a long walk in the park and some
self-reflection. Time to start
meditating and get focused again and take care of myself the best I know how.
